Keep In Touch!

By Rayma Zugel

     Lead Center Director

“Keep in Touch.” We’ve all said it…when leaving school, a job, moving away from your home. “Keep in Touch.” But what does that actually mean?

Farlex Dictionary of Idioms says:

~To maintain contact with another person, especially at intervals so as to remain up to date with each other’s lives.

~An informal parting phrase, especially with someone one isn’t likely to see again anytime soon.

We say it, but do we mean it?  Do we do it? I’ll be one of the first to admit I am terrible when it comes to keeping in touch, and yet when I do, it can mean the world to me as well as someone else. I have a friend back home in Michigan that I rarely get a chance to talk to, and yet every time we do it’s like we’ve never lost touch.  More often than not we end our conversation by saying, “Let’s do better about keeping in touch.”

At Care Net we ask each client we meet with if we can keep in touch by way of an evaluation. They get the chance after meeting with a Peer-Counselor to evaluate us and then give us (or not) permission to keep in touch, or follow up with them. I have heard more than once, “You called me just to check on me?” Why yes, yes we did. We want to keep in touch with our clients.

Kevin shares how when he kept in touch with a client the client stated, “The appointment was the confidence builder he needed” to be a good Dad. Keep in touch.

Another way of saying, “Keep in Touch” could be, “Remember Me.” In Luke 23:42 the thief on the cross next to Jesus said, “Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom.” What was Jesus’ response? In verse 43 He said, “Truly I say to you today you will be with me in Paradise.”

Jesus, as He is on the cross, after being beaten and ridiculed…after being stripped of His clothing and nailed to the cross. His thoughts were on the man crying out to be remembered by Him.

As we look towards Holy Week and prepare to commemorate the death, burial, and then celebrate the resurrection of our Savior Jesus Christ, let’s remember to “Keep in Touch”…with each other and with the One who loves you so much He died for you.

"Hey, It's Time To Talk!"

By Willow Sanders

      Director of Student Services

Funny how that phrase does not startle us as parents as much as this one:

It’s time for THE talk.

However, eventually the time will come. Unfortunately, in our fast-paced culture the need for that “talk” will come sooner than most of us would like. We do not have to dread it though. Honestly most of us probably have dreaded that time for a few major reasons:

            It was handled about as awkward as things get for us as children.

Times are different and that difference can be a win in our column as parents. There is access to information that just was not available to our parents. We can Google sites and read books that can really make us prepared instead of have us stammering for words. Focus on the Family has a great layout in the “God’s Design for Sex” series.  https://www.amazon.com/Full-Set-Design-Revised-Paperback/dp/B00O5DIVTU/ref=sr_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1520006866&sr=8-3&keywords=god%27s+design+for+sex+series%2C+4+book       

We still see them as not ready and do not want to awaken anything before it is time.

Consider this scenario: You go to get a late night snack, say a bowl of cereal. You think you have all you need for the time that is at hand only to open the fridge and realize NO MILK. You pass the store regularly, you open the fridge daily yet what should have been obvious to deal with is ignored until the need is great. So goes that way in many households when it comes to the topic of discussing sex and sexuality with our children. Anne Marie Miller, in her book, 5 Things Every Parent Needs to Know about Their Kids & Sex sets out to do just that: get parents prepared and knowledgeable on the “Talk” at any age of development. Check it out at http://5thingsbook.com/  

We don’t want to share our past choices and seem hypocritical.

Let me reassure you there is NO ONE better suited than you to guide your child through this journey. With every other area it seems vying for our children’s hearts and minds, Passport 2 Purity http://www.familylife.com/passport2purity puts the conversation back where it should be: in the home. Check out their materials as they aim to build heart-to-heart communication between you and your pre-teen while laying a foundation of purity that will prepare them for the turbulent years ahead.

This journey is not for the faint of heart but once we are centered to play offense, we will be ready to stand strong in defense of our children, families, and communities.

You were called to this!

You shall be equipped for it!

We believe in you!

Peacemaker or Peacekeeper?

By Sue Chess
      Executive Director

Peacemaker is just a biblical way of saying peacekeeper—or is it?  Isn’t keeping the peace what Matthew 5:9 was saying on the “Sermon on the mount” as Jesus was speaking?  Let us consider.

Somewhere in today’s culture we have lost the easy ability to determine the difference between these two words. 

When was the last time you kept quiet, not because you agreed with some stated truth but because you did not find it worth confronting?

 

You kept the peace, not made peace. 

Here at Care Net, we just finished our Spring Volunteer Training.  One of the concepts we teach is the importance of care-fronting our clients.  We teach prospective volunteers this phrase, “Our clients do not care how much we know until they know how much we care.”  This lays the foundation for telling truth in a gentle and loving way within the counseling room.

 

Suzan was just such a client.  In an earlier conversation, she revealed her love for God and her desire to please Him. However, the difficulties of her current circumstance of an unplanned pregnancy combined with her father’s standing in the church was completely overwhelming that reality.

 

What makes ultimate peace with Suzan may not be what keeps peace presently. To restate that, what would lead to peace would be currently disturbing.

The skill we want to impart of care-fronting allows us to ask hard questions such as what her future relationship with her father might feel like if she ultimately chose abortion.  I recalled our client testimony heard here https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9jF_MgLO8S0 .  How wonderful to have this real life story that ends with a different scenario because of truth.  This real life Mommy chose the hard path and told her parents even though she knew it would bring temporary chaos.  Three years later, we received an email from this client just before her little girl’s third birthday.  She was planning a party but first sent us an email just to say, “Thank you, Care Net, for my little girl’s life!”   Her “rest of the story” testimony was of her father’s adoration for her baby girl today.

 

Doing hard things is OFTEN what leads us to true peace.  As C.S. Lewis said, “God cannot give us happiness and peace apart from Himself, because it is not there.”  Satan is an imitator and an imposter.  He tries to drown out that peace path by pushing us to make the wrong decision to keep temporary peace.  Showing our clients an ultrasound so they can see the TRUTH of life in the womb can be very disturbing but is sometimes all they need to make the right choice.  Sadly, Care Net has even watched the Church seek to keep peace by remaining silent on abortion in the Church.  They keep silent to “keep the peace.”  Meanwhile, according to a study done by Lifeway and Care Net in 2016, more than 1 in 3 (36%) women were attending a Christian church once a month or more at the time of their first abortion.  Churches have also fallen prey to

keeping peace rather than making peace.  By simply laying the groundwork for “care-fronting” hard topics such as abortion, the Church could speak truth in a gentle and loving way, thus making lasting peace.  Sadly, we’ve had church leaders tell us that they can’t talk about abortion because they have pro-abortion members.

 

Really?

The incredible value of lovingly asking questions that search, or sharing the Biblical standard for life, even speaking about abstinence and abortion from the platform, cannot be underestimated.  If your Pastor boldly confronts the truth, please THANK him!  It is not easy in today’s culture of “just co-exist, don’t confront me.” 

In summary, peacemakers become a connection between God’s ways and His children even if it brings temporary discomfort.  Peacekeepers paste an artificial, political smile on their face and just try to avoid any upsetting words.

I have no doubt as to which God would prefer.